As the pastor of an evangelical church in a Midwestern suburb, John was hitting his stride.  Literally, John was well liked by his church family and he confidently lead the growing congregation according to the Word of God.  He lived as if Jesus’ return was imminent and spoke God’s Word passionately.

While searching for an illustration he could use for his New Year’s sermon, he came across a web article titled, “What trips your trigger?”.  As he read about a man who became easily frustrated with daily annoyances, he understood.  John wasn’t sure if this article would work as an appropriate illustration, though he read further since he was intrigued by the man’s honesty.  John connected with the man’s struggle with feeling pressed by numerous home and church needs.   John recognized he had similar issues as the man in the article, experiencing several nights of interrupted sleep, especially after board meetings.

John thought to himself, for a brief moment, is the man’s reactions in this article normal?  Then he asked himself quietly, Am I even normal as a minister to react similar to him?

What are you thoughts here?  Does John or the man (in the article) have normal reactions to pressure or stress?

So if his reactions are normal, does that mean he does not need help?  Or if his reactions are not normal, should he get help?

Do you think if John placed some focus on how he could respond to pressure or stress in his ministry, would help his health?  Help him maintain helping others?

Starting a new habit sounds easy and can be, if it includes a quart of ice cream a day or sleeping late.  Okay, beginning healthy habits are often disastrous because they are short lived and often involve a lot of discomfort.  Being healthy generally involved denying yourself something you normally have every day or doing something that you rarely do which kills any motivation to change.

Do you remember in the past, trying the latest diet or buying a gym membership?  Sometimes we depend upon our own strength to begin new a habit, without thought and prayer.  Other times, we believe in will power and a new book to bring about change.  Often, we try to conquer a bad habit in a few weeks, which is like patching a water pipe leak with duck tape.  Our attempts and solutions are often temporary or have minimal results.

For those who have found success, beginning a new habit is a process of making small changes.  No matter how much we want to eat different foods or pay money to get fit, change rarely occurs unless there are two ingredients involve.  The first is confidence and the second is motivation. As the Solomon writes in the book of Proverbs, “My son, preserve sound judgment and discernment … for the Lord will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being snared”, (Proverbs 3:20 & 26).

Taking responsibility for your health through discernment of small, attainable steps enables a person to build confidence.  Receiving support from others and grasping the importance of your results (like lowering blood pressure, increased energy level, etc) can build one’s motivation to building the healthy habit.

The truth behind healthy habits is the belief each one is built over time with the intention of being a life long habit.  Often, the development of each habit is based upon very small steps and monitoring your results.  Some find writing down their weekly steps and results help build their success (like charts or pictures on the refrigerator), others find working with a group of like minded people help completion of each step towards healthy habits.

Whatever your course or desired goal, be sure to consult your primary care physician and get the support of those important to you.  Seeking a spiritual basis for each step, along with spiritual disciplines in accordance with God’s Word will build a deeper confidence in God and motivation in building healthy habits.

Stress seems to find us then follow some of us wherever we go!  Are you interested in how stress affects you?

On a separate piece of paper, write numbers from 1-10 and write your corresponding answer to each question.  Consider how you are internally affected when in each situation and how those feelings affect your thoughts and actions.

1.  How often do you feel you are unable to control important things in your life (like time with family, serving in ministry, ministry preparation, time to relax, etc)?

Never               Some Days           Most Days             Daily                  Several Times Daily

1                                   2                               3                           4                                      5

2.  How often do you get upset while working at your computer (home and office)?

Never               Almost             Sometimes                    Fairly Often                  Very Often

1                                2                           3                                         4                                      5

3.  How comfortable or relaxed do you feel at staff or team meetings?

Not at all          Occasionally     Somewhat Often           Fairly Often            Very Often

5                             4                                3                                        2                               1

4.  I fit into the social setting within my office setting and/or ministry setting?

Seldom             Sometimes          Depends upon …       Fairly Often                  Very Often

5                              4                               3                                    2                                       1

5.  I feel pressured to make more money to pay for family or personal expenses.

Never               Occasionally        Sometimes                 Fairly Often                  Very Often

1                                   2                               3                                      4                                    5

6.  I’ve consider seeking a new position at church or a new job somewhere else over the last two months.

Never               Almost Have      Sometimes                 Often                    Very Often

1                              2                           3                                 4                               5

7.  When at home during a heated family discussion, I get headaches or feel pressure on my chest?

Never               Somewhat           Sometimes                 Fairly Often                  Very Often

1                         2                                3                                      4                                     5

8.  I let people (family, friends and/or co-workers) down, unable to meet their expectations.

Never               Sometimes           Generally                   Fairly Often                  Very Often

1                         2                                3                                      4                                        5

9.  Recently, someone in my home has told me he/she is dissatisfied with their life.

Never               Maybe             Has Happened             Fairly Often                  Very Often

1                         2                               3                                      4                                      5

10. I have difficulty trusting what others (church, friends or family) say is really true.

Never               Almost             Sometimes                    Fairly Often                  Very Often

1                         2                           3                                         4                                          5

Now add up your scores and compare to the numbers below.

10-20  -  You are not affected by daily stressors or are in denial.

20-25   -  Even though your life is eventful, you are human and able to handle stress.

25-35  -  Your reactions to stress affect you thoughts and actions, causing some concern.

35-50  -  Stressful events are affecting your daily functioning, with great concern.

Specific way to analyze your responses.

1. Look at each answer you scored a 3 or above.
2. Consider why you answered the way you did and how your answer affects your daily stress or the total amount of stress by the end of your week.
3. Ask yourself, how you are coping with each stressor and consider other options to coping.
4. On the questions you answered 4 and/or 5, consider reading relevant articles on your area of stress.  Also consider applicable scriptures or spiritual disciplines to help you handle the stressor.
5. If you choose to seek professional assistance with the stressor(s), you have an 8 out of 10 probability you will find positive change with your stress.

What is self care?

Simply put, caring for one’s own self.  Another way to put it, loving your self the way God loves you in order to glorify God.  Self care enables your self to be equipped to serve. Then if self care is necessary for glorifying God, then why is it so hard?

Throughout our spiritual development we have taken time in silence to be spiritually equipped by reading His Word and petitioning His grace.  Though when our emotional needs are drained or cognitive resources depleted, we may ignore refueling or push on for the sake of the cause.  Later we wonder why getting out of bed can be so hard or why we resent making another call.

Ok, so we see the picture clearly, loving our self means to care for all of our needs, whether spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically or relationally.  Since we know taking time for our health is important, let’s review the checklist below to identify your needs and the last time your took time for yourself.

1. I have seen my primary care physician in the last 8-10 months.
2. Relaxed when I ate my lunch, without reading or talking about work or my schedule.
3. Talked to someone other than my spouse about an emotional struggle, hardship or challenge.
4. Faced a conflict with my spouse, co-worker or neighbor in order to reconcile differences.
5. Had an eye examination and/or had corrective dental work; a dental exam would suffice.
6. Went out with my spouse (if married) or best friend (if single) for fun, without an agenda.
7. Relaxed while waiting in line at Wal-Mart or smiled while waiting in the car for my spouse.
8. Looked inside at what you’re feeling and thinking after hearing disappointing news about … .
9. When have you added one physical activity (exercise) to your weekly routine?
10. Told someone outside your family “no” in order have time for … .
11. Went to a worship service other than your home church for no other purpose than to worship.